Anyone who has been in a committed long-term relationship understands just how challenging it all can be. Not just dealing with the ups and downs of life but having to take care of each other at their worst.
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One couple, husband and wife Jill and Ryan Finley, were tested to the maximum when Ryan had to decide whether Jill should stay on life support or not. The doctors advised one thing, Jill’s parents another and he himself had a differing opinion. But in the end, he had to make a choice – one which could either save his wife’s life or end it forever.
Married for Years
Both 31, the Finleys had been married for four years and loved the quiet life they had created with each other in Oklahoma. Ryan was a plumbing contractor and Jill worked as a loan underwriter.
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The couple had a good group of friends and family around and loved married life. Having known each other for some years now and successfully navigated many challenges together, the couple knew that they were made for each other.
Cosy Routine
While some couples struggle after moving together, this wasn’t the case for Ryan and Jill. They had found a good routine. Ryan always woke up at 7 A.M sharp and got ready for the day while he let Jill sleep a little before the couple had their breakfast together.
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In hindsight, Ryan realized just how important this routine had been. Had Ryan slept in that day, the outcome of this story might have been much different. We digress though, on the day it was as everything should have been.
Alarmed
Ryan woke up as usual but rather than quietly go to the bathroom, he had a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. Something was off but what? He looked around the room and everything seemed to be in order.
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His wife was lying next to him, sleeping but Ryan still couldn’t get rid of this feeling. He gently nudged Jill, wanting to talk about his fear but she remained asleep. And that is when Ryan knew what was wrong.
Not Breathing
He nudged her harder but Jill made no response. Ryan began yelling at his wife to wake up and check to see if she had been hurt. But outwardly, she looked as she should have been! Ryan began panicking!
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After fidgeting for his phone, he dialled 911 and even saying the words out loud felt wrong to him. Jill was healthy, in her early thirties. She hadn’t complained about any health issues ever? So, why wasn’t she waking up?!
Training
The 911 Responder tried to calm Ryan down but nothing was working. He needed help now! Years ago, he had taken a First Response class but he barely remembered anything from it – especially not in this frazzled condition.
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But Ryan knew he had to do something while the EMT arrived, so he started doing CPR on his wife. He focused his mind to concentrate because he knew that one wrong move could do more harm than good.
EMTs!
Jill was still unresponsive and with each passing minute, Ryan was sure that it was too late. It took the paramedics to arrive on the scene in 15 minutes but to Ryan, it felt like it had been hours!
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The distraught husband kept performing CPR until they arrived. Seeing the red flashing lights gave him comfort! Help was finally here and Jill now had a chance but as he saw the EMT’s examine his wife, he saw that they had a look of hopelessness.
It Worked – Kinda!
After performing CPR themselves, the EMTs still couldn’t get a heartbeat and used a defibrillator on site. If they couldn’t get a pulse even with the machine, Jill would have been pronounced dead.
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But luckily, Jill still had some fight left in her. With one sharp shock, her heart seemed to reach a normal rhythm! They had a pulse! A weak one, but a pulse nonetheless. Jill needed to go to the hospital and that too quickly.
Prayed
She was taken to Oklahoma Heart Center and as Ryan sat in the ambulance rushing to it, all he could do was pray. He was felt like a desperate man who needed someone or something to help him.
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He was confused as to what had happened to Jill. The night before, she was fine but as she slept, something had gone terribly wrong and his young wife was now fighting for life before it had barely even begun.
At the Hospital
Upon arriving at the hospital, Jill was rushed to the ICU ward. Ryan knew he had to step away and let the doctors take over and as everyone crowded around his wife’s unresponsive body, Ryan felt broken.
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He was asked to wait outside and while Ryan felt too distraught to even think, he knew he needed to call Jill’s parents and let them know about what had happened. Jill would have wanted them to be there and he needed some support.
Stabilizing Her
The 31-year-old had a pulse, nothing else and as Jill’s parents arrived at the hospital the physicians finally reported what had exactly happened to Jill. She had suffered a heart attack while she was sleeping.
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And for five minutes, her body was without oxygen leading to her developing neurological disorders. During this time, her body was also unable to regulate the temperature correctly and Jill was put in a hypothermic environment to bring down her body temperature.
Only Hope
Jill was still unconscious but as her body temperature regulated, the doctor’s hoped that she would recover awareness. Right now, all they could do was minimize any damage to Jill’s brain.
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They hoped that the oxygen deprivation wouldn’t have resulted in any permanent brain damage but they couldn’t be sure until Jill woke up. They put her on life support to help her breathe and waited.
By Her Side
And just as Ryan had promised on the day of their wedding and many times after, he took care of his wife in sickness. As the hours turns into days, he never left her side. Rather than go home, he decided to take short naps next to her bed.
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He watched over as the nurses bathed her while he brushed her hair. With each passing day, he could see how the doctors and nurses were losing hope in his wife recovering from this unfortunate event but Ryan never lost hope.
The Next Step
The distraught husband knew that one day, his wife was going to wake up and make a full recovery and he wanted to be right next to her when that happened. But then Ryan was told that he had to make a decision.
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After intensive care, Jill had not made any progress towards her recovery. The doctors still thought she had a one per cent chance of ever waking up and after the required period of observation had passed, Ryan needed to choose what to do next.
Her Parent’s Input
Just as Ryan had been by Jill’s side, so had her parents. Seeing their child fighting for her life was torture for them and something no parent ever wants to go through. But no matter how hard it got, Jill’s parents tried to stay strong.
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And before Ryan made any decision, he consulted them on what to do. Jill wasn’t recovering and still was not able to breathe on her own and the doctor’s worried that even she woke up, she wouldn’t be the same.
A Remark
Despite intense conversations, neither Ryan nor Jill’s parents could decide clearly on what to do. As far as the doctors were concerned, all hope was lost. During one such discussion, Ryan remembered something he and his wife had discussed before.
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One of Jill’s family members had also been on life support once and she had remarked how she would never have wanted to endure such a fate or put her family through this ordeal. She personally preferred to be off life support and let nature decide her fate.
The Right Thing
Ryan told Jill’s parents about the conversation and as hard as it was to hear, they too agreed that this felt like something Jill would have wanted. And with the doctors seeing no improvement in her condition, this felt like the right option.
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Keeping Jill “alive” in this vegetive state wasn’t really helping her and her family knew that. With a heavy heart, they decided to take Jill off life support and let her find some peace. A decision that broke Ryan to make but one which he knew would have made Jill happy.
The Last Rally
Once the difficult decision had been made to take Jill off of life support, the doctors informed Ryan of a medical term known as the ‘last rally,”. This rather scarring process happens when a person gets taken off of life support.
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This patient can make sounds and move their body, as it starts to shut down. Sometimes it may seem as the person is fighting to stay alive and mumble words or even move their torso. Ryan felt sick at the thought that he would have to see his wife through all this but knew it had to be done.
Something Strange
The day came and Ryan prepared himself for what was to come. Jill’s parents couldn’t bear to see her in “the last rally”, so it was only him inside the hospital room. And after signing all the paperwork, the doctor’s began taking Jill off life support.
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Slowly, they turned off each machine that was helping his wife stay alive and with each beep his heart sank. He was watching his wife pass away and couldn’t do anything about it and in under an hour, Jill began her last rally.
Trying To Talk
Instantly though, the doctors noticed that Jill throughout this process sounded more and more like she was trying to speak rather than unconscious mumblings and even after a few hours off life support, she was still fighting and alive.
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At one point, it sounded like Jill was saying that she wanted to leave the hospital and go home! Ryan and the Hospital staff were stunned! It seemed like, Jill was recovering — after she was taken off the life support machine. Something that was unheard of.
Disbelief
Medical staff rushed towards Jill, realizing that rather than passing away the young woman was fighting to stay alive and gaining consciousness! And after a few hours of close conversation, Jill woke up!
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The day when Jill was supposed to leave this earth forever, became the day when Jill came back to Ryan and no one could understand or believe how. On top of that, she had not sustained any permanent neurological damage due to oxygen deprivation.
New Life
The nightmare that had started weeks ago was finally over. Ryan could finally breathe! His wife was slowly recovering and after some physical therapy was back to normal in no time. Her remarkable fight to stay alive was something doctors couldn’t even comprehend!
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While the medical staff can’t fully explain how Jill came back to consciousness, Ryan and his wife don’t really care. They are just beyond grateful that they are together and healthy and happy. Something they will never take for granted again.